Tuesday, April 3, 2012

The Solution For World Peace

Yes, ladies and germs, I finally have it.

You may say that the reason why this blog went on such an unannounced hiatus for so long was this very solution.
After all, world peace is no joking matter. 
Its what every pageant queen is passionately concerned about. Hence, it must be important.

So anyway, first about the process of getting to the solution. I put up many variables with much other mumbojumbo, contemplated for hours on end like Rumi and Gibran, thought endlessly and penned tomes wondering what the solution could eventually be. I put nuclear disarmament up with democratic rights, affirmative action up with a new system of economic governance, free healthcare up with tax rebates. I thought lengthily like an economist to make sure all would be well at the end, shrewdly like a business entity about what would cost me the least, ethically like a Social Sciences student and mechanically like an Engineer to make sure the model would fit and work.

And the solution, which you await with bated breath, I can tell you, consists of only two words. 

Yes, that's right. 
Two words, 14 letters. 

The solution is in fact
Fabric Softener.

No, please dont push back your chairs and leave. 
Listen. 
Hear me out.


Here is my proposed plan of action.
1. Buy tons of fabric softener.
2. Make all world leaders and people in power, bad people included, smell it in small amounts, just gentle enough to waft through their nostrils, not too overtly so as they get nauseated by its smell.*
3. Et voilĂ !
The gentle calm fragrance calms them down, put relaxing music on behind, put the air conditioning on full blast to keep everyone's hot heads within limits and begin peace talks.
4. Attain world peace.

Disclaimer- This methodology has not yet been tried, hence its effects and causes on world peace are yet unknown. But if licensed for use under the copyright of Abeer Yusuf, this will probably be a good idea. Please remember, all credit and creative practise licenses belong to Abeer Yusuf, probably going to be called Inventor of World Peace once this takes off (jjjyeaaah!)


*- The application of this is in the appropriate manner is of utmost importance, because everything relies in the moderation and effusion and diffusion of this. If you must know, they call me the Nose amongst the great science circles for my keen ability to sniff out stuff.

5 comments:

  1. you brightened up my day! :D
    must get fabric softener to parents' nostrils when they're in a mood :P :P

    ReplyDelete
  2. Interesting and moreover beautifully penned.

    ReplyDelete
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